Briar Patch Page 5

  ‘Are all of these for me?’

  ‘Yes, of course. I haven’t worn most of them, Carrie. The beads are coral and given to me by an elderly aunt years ago. They are worth a few pounds if you wished to sell them.’

  ‘No!’ Carrie held on to the beads fiercely. ‘I ain’t never going to sell them. I shall wear them under my dress so Pa doesn’t see them and take them off me.’

  ‘Will your mother let you keep the things, Carrie?’

  ‘I’ll hide them safe. She won’t know. No one knows where I hide my treasures.’

  Mrs Blake had made it clear she regarded the gift as charity and rejected it, but Carrie must have heard and followed. Roz hadn’t the heart to refuse her and surely it could do no harm.

  ‘Well, you know best.’ Roz paused, then: ‘I should like to see your baby one day, Carrie. Is she as pretty as you?’

  ‘Ma says she’s perfect, better than me.’ Carrie raised her head and looked Roz in the eyes. ‘Folk say I’m daft but I know what goes on, miss. I wanted a baby of my own and I’ve got one. Pa wants to give it away but Ma won’t let him.’ She gathered her things. ‘Thank you for these, miss.’ She hesitated, then: ‘I take Milly for a walk in the mornings sometimes and I go down to the wild meadow. I could bring her tomorrow.’

  ‘Would you do that?’ Roz smiled. Perhaps Carrie was a little simple but she certainly wasn’t stupid. She liked her dreamy look and the smile that lit her eyes from inside. ‘I should like to see her if you don’t mind, Carrie.’

  ‘I’ll bring her tomorrow,’ Carrie promised. ‘Thank you for the things, miss. I’ve never had pretty bits like them beads and the lace.’

  ‘You are very welcome.’ Impulsively Roz moved towards her, kissing her on the cheek. ‘I shall walk to your wild meadow at this time tomorrow.’

  ‘Bye then, miss.’ Carrie seemed to be looking beyond Roz and her eyes had lost their animation, becoming vacant as she stared into space.

  Roz realized that she had switched off. She walked away, glancing back a couple of times. Carrie was still standing in the same place, clutching her bundle in her arms. Roz understood why people thought she was daft; she wasn’t really, just different.

  Some of Roz’s anger had drained out of her but now she felt empty and lost. The future seemed grey and endless. What was she going to do with the rest of her life?

  At least she was luckier than Carrie. Yet Carrie hadn’t seemed resentful. She’d said she wanted a baby, which struck Roz as a little strange. Somehow that didn’t fit with her story of being raped, but perhaps she only felt like that now she had the child. Her emotions must have been all over the place these past few months.

  Roz would not have to face the same humiliation. Her womanly flow had started six days after the night she’d been raped. Had she been carrying Paul Richmond’s baby, she might have killed herself. Her mother would never have forgiven her for bringing shame on them.

  It was going to be hard living with just Lady Thornton for company. The move to the dower house would happen while Philip and Julia were on their honeymoon. Before that there was the wedding.

  ‘We shall stay with Julia’s aunt for a few days,’ Lady Thornton had told her daughter the previous evening. ‘Lady Mary is giving Julia a wedding reception as a gift. I had thought they might prefer to have the wedding here, but apparently Julia’s aunt wants to have it at her home.’

  ‘That’s kind of her, Mama – and will save you the trouble.’

  ‘As if I should grudge anything I do for my children. However, Julia is anxious to oblige her aunt and naturally Philip agreed. I shall arrange for our things to be moved while we are away and we’ll return to the dower house.’

  ‘I suppose we couldn’t let the dower house and take a house in Bath?’

  ‘Whatever are you thinking about?’ Lady Thornton looked down her long nose. ‘I couldn’t possibly afford to live in Bath. You must make up your mind to a quiet life at home with me – or find someone to marry.’

  ‘No one has asked me,’ Roz reminded her mother. ‘I might have said yes had Mr Harcourt shown any interest – but he’d heard about Carrie Blake and I dare say he did not wish to be associated with our family.’ His disapproval had made her uncomfortable at the dinner table.

  ‘Philip told me that her brother had the effrontery to enter the archery contest. He says you let him win the money – did you?’

  ‘I might have done. She was owed something.’

  ‘I do not know how you could say such a thing. After what happened, they should never have attended the fete. Philip should have sent him away instantly.’

  ‘Do you not think that might have caused more scandal?’

  ‘Please do not contradict me. Allow me to be the judge of what is proper.’

  Roz let the argument go. Her mother would be angry if she learned that Roz had taken Carrie some clothes and the coral beads, but there was no need for her to know. Mama seemed to have put the blame entirely on the Blake family, though surely she must have known her husband’s reputation. It seemed that her irritation was saved for her daughter, though Roz had no idea what she had done to deserve it.

  It was nearly time for luncheon. Roz quickened her step as she reached her home. She was almost at the door when a gentleman came out, a smile on his face as he saw her.

  ‘Miss Thornton. Your mama said you had gone for a walk.’

  ‘Yes. It was such a lovely morning.’

  ‘I know you like to walk and to ride.’ Harold Rushden hesitated. ‘Lady Thornton tells me you are moving to the dower house after the wedding. You will find it very quiet, I think?’

  ‘Yes, I dare say we shall. We must hope that Julia will invite us to dinner or a card evening now and then.’

  ‘Someone as lovely as you shouldn’t be hidden away. As you know, I spend part of the year in London or Bath – if you married me you could hold your own evening parties whenever you wish. Without meaning to brag, I’m thought of as quite a respectable and wealthy man, Miss Thornton – or may I call you Roz? As my wife, you would be the mistress of two houses and have your own horses and rig.’

  His proposal was so unexpected that for a moment she couldn’t find the breath to answer.

  ‘Are you asking me to marry you, Mr Rushden?’

  ‘Yes, of course. Forgive me for being so clumsy. I’m a plain-spoken man, but I care for you – always have. I should be happy if you would take me.’

  ‘I hardly know how to answer you, sir. I was not expecting a proposal.’

  ‘Your brother knows my feelings. I thought he would have told you.’ His dark eyes were intent on her face. ‘I know you’re not in love with me. If you could bring yourself to be a proper wife to me, I would be satisfied with kindness and courtesy, which is what you’ll get from me, Roz.’

  The words of refusal were on the tip of her tongue. She had no right to accept his generous offer even if she wanted to marry him and in her heart it was the last thing she wanted. Yet what was she going to do if she refused him?

  Roz studied her suitor. His features were heavy, his nose short and his jaw square, eyes closer together than she liked, but he was strong and healthy. He had a fine estate close by – and a townhouse. She would be able to live in London for several months a year. It was the life she had been taught to expect.

  ‘This has taken me by surprise, sir. Would you allow me a little time to consider?’

  ‘Take all the time you want,’ he said and a look of relief spread over his face. ‘I thought you would turn me down flat.’

  ‘I’m grateful and . . . honoured that you asked,’ Roz said. ‘If I give you my answer after Philip’s wedding, will that be soon enough?’

  ‘Aye. Your brother invited me to the wedding but I shan’t come. I’ll send a gift and leave it at that – I won’t badger you for an answer, Roz – and if it’s no I’ll understand. You might have done better if your father hadn’t come to a sticky end. I’ve country manners and I ain’t no oil painting.’
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  ‘You shouldn’t put yourself down,’ Roz said and offered him her hand. ‘Just because some of our friends have fancy manners and live in town it doesn’t mean they’re better than you.’

  ‘Aye, well, I thought that fellow Richmond might have turned your head but he’s no gentleman, Roz.’ He held her hands between his big ones for a moment then released her.

  ‘When we return I shall send word.’

  ‘I’ll know when you’re back.’ He walked on to where a groom stood ready with his horse.

  Roz turned her head and watched him mount and ride away. Once upon a time she had thought she would rather remain unwed than marry him, but she had expected to have several offers. Now her chances were practically nil because her father had left the estate in such a desperate situation.

  Would it be wrong to marry him?

  Roz wondered what he would say if he knew what had happened to her on the night of their ball. Philip had said she wouldn’t be believed in court. Harold Rushden might think she’d invited trouble by going for a walk alone at night.

  Her heart told her to reject his offer but her head warned that she might not get another chance to escape from her mother’s scolding.

  Roz saw Carrie as she approached the meadow the next morning. The grass was high but the girl was sitting on the bank above the stream. Her child lay on a shawl on the grass beside her and the girl was chewing the end of a grass stalk and staring into the distance. She didn’t appear to notice Roz until she spoke to her.

  ‘I wasn’t sure you would come. May I see the baby?’

  Carrie turned her dreamy eyes on her and smiled. ‘Hello. I brought Milly to see you, miss. Ma is glad to get us out of the way for a bit. I’m more of a hindrance than a help to her.’

  ‘I’m sure that’s not true.’ Roz said sat down on the dry grass. The child had lovely fair hair just covering her head and the bluest eyes she had ever seen.

  ‘She has your hair and eyes,’ Roz said, slightly disappointed. She’d hoped for a sign, something that would confirm the identity of the baby’s father. ‘You must be proud of her, Carrie.’

  ‘She knows what you say to her. She sucks my finger and cries when she wants feeding. Ma showed me how to change her cloths. I look after her myself.’

  Carrie’s pride was obvious. Roz touched the tiny fists and smiled. ‘I’m glad it turned out so well.’

  Carrie picked up the child and put her into Roz’s arms. Milly burped and then seemed to smile. Roz stroked her cheek with her finger.

  ‘She really is a darling, Carrie.’

  ‘She likes you,’ Carrie said. ‘She knows you’re her aunt. I had an aunt once but Ma said she died – that means they put her in a box in the ground like Dick. Maybe she’ll come back one day. Dick is coming back. It might be today. I come to meet him most mornings.’

  ‘She isn’t my niece, she’s my . . .’ Roz frowned. ‘The squire is dead, Carrie. Didn’t they put Milly’s father in a box in the ground?’

  Carrie’s laughter was soft and low. ‘’Course not. Squire isn’t in the ground. He comes riding this way sometimes, but he hasn’t been by for a few days. I shall show him Milly when he comes. He’ll give me a shilling for her.’

  Roz felt cold all over. Carrie had a pleased smile on her lips but it wasn’t one of guile or maliciousness. Roz didn’t think she was lying or making up tales.

  ‘Do you mean Squire Philip, Carrie?’

  The girl turned her bland gaze on her and nodded. ‘Aye, your brother, miss. You be Squire’s sister – and he be Milly’s pa.’

  ‘Did my brother hurt you, Carrie? Did he force you?’

  Carrie stared at her for a moment, then: ‘He said to tell me ma it was force. Said it was best to say Squire and not his name. He promised he would look after me if I did what he said.’

  Roz felt the sickness rise in her throat. She got hurriedly to her feet and walked away before she said something she might regret. The girl hadn’t known what she was doing or realized the consequences – but Philip had known.

  Roz stared at her reflection in the mirror, feeling shame and disgust. How could her brother have seduced a girl like Carrie and then blamed the consequences on his father? He’d shown no signs of guilt or remorse over his father’s death.

  It should have been Philip lying in the family crypt. Roz knew that if she’d gone to her father and told him what Paul Richmond had done he would have thrashed him. Philip had made her keep quiet because he wanted to marry Paul’s sister to save his own skin.

  What would Julia think if she knew the truth? He deserved that Roz should tell her before the wedding – but would Julia thank her for revealing what kind of a man Philip really was?

  Roz’s anger had carried her home but now she just felt sick and ashamed. The plans for the wedding were moving ahead and if Julia jilted Philip now he would probably lose the estate. His creditors had given him time because he was marrying an heiress.

  He ought to be punished but he wasn’t the only one who would suffer. Roz’s mother would be homeless and Julia would be shamed in her turn. She didn’t have the right to pull down this house of cards, Roz decided.

  One day she might find a way to punish Philip, but to vent her anger on others would be spiteful – and she only had Carrie’s word for it that Philip was the father of her child. She’d lied at the start and caused a double tragedy. Had she told the truth her brother might have thrashed Philip and made him pay something for her child. He had been angrier than he might have been because Squire Thornton was known for taking down innocent girls. Carrie’s child might not be of the old squire’s getting, but that didn’t mean he was washed clean of all sin. If Roz’s father hadn’t raped Carrie, he’d done it to others. His reputation had sealed his fate. Dick Blake had seen red and acted in a blind rage – but he might not have been so furious if he’d realized Philip was to blame. Especially if he’d known that Carrie was willing.

  There was a bitter taste in Roz’s mouth. Philip had caused all this wretchedness with his selfish behaviour. He hadn’t wanted to own up to what he’d done and so he’d persuaded Carrie to lie.

  Because of Philip, her father was dead and everything that followed had stemmed from the double tragedy. If Roz’s father had still been alive his bank would not have decided to call in his debts – and that meant Paul Richmond might never have been invited to the ball.

  How could she go to Philip’s wedding? Roz felt she would be sick if she looked at him – but would her mother allow her to stay at home alone?

  ‘Not go to your brother’s wedding?’ Lady Thornton stared at her in disbelief. ‘Think what people might say – and the offence it would cause to Julia.’

  ‘You could tell Julia I wasn’t well.’

  ‘You would have me lie to her?’ Roz felt the severity of her mother’s gaze. ‘I don’t understand you. Why do you wish to miss such a happy occasion? You may well meet Mr Harcourt at the wedding, Roz. You wanted to visit Bath – if you married Mr Harcourt you would be able to go where you please.’

  ‘I doubt he will ask me.’ Roz raised her head to meet her mother’s gaze. ‘Mr Rushden has made me an offer. I’ve promised to give him my answer when we return.’

  ‘Mr Rushden?’ Her mother’s expression of displeasure faded instantly. ‘Now that would be suitable, Roz. I hope you intend to say yes?’

  ‘I think I may – but I need time to think. If you would let me stay here, I could be alone and consider my answer.’

  ‘If you are in two minds you should accompany me to Julia’s aunt’s house. Lady Mary has many friends. You might meet someone more suitable, Roz.’

  Roz sighed inwardly. She should have known that her mother would insist. If she knew the reason her daughter wanted to stay home she would be horrified – and yet she might still decide that they had no choice but to carry on as if nothing had happened.

  Five

  ‘Roz . . .’ Philip caught her arm as she tried to pass him in the hall at Julia’
s aunt’s house. ‘You’ve been giving me the cold shoulder since you arrived this morning – you’re not still angry over what I said, are you? I was thinking of you as much as myself. The scandal would’ve ruined you.’

  Roz flashed him a scathing look. ‘You don’t think that’s already the case?’

  ‘Mama told me Rushden has spoken to you. You should take him. He’s always been mad for you.’

  ‘Perhaps he won’t be so interested when I tell him the truth.’

  ‘Don’t be a fool, Roz. He doesn’t have to know – if you’re clever.’

  Roz felt a rush of vomit to her throat.

  ‘I’m not as proficient a liar as you.’

  ‘What do you mean?’

  ‘Do you really want to know?’ She faced him then, blazing with anger. ‘We’d better go into the study. You might not want anyone else to hear this.’

  Philip looked at her uncertainly, then turned and walked into the study. Roz followed and shut the door behind her.

  ‘I’ve seen your daughter, Philip. She looks very much like her mother at the moment but babies change as they grow. Once her hair gets darker she will look more like you.’

  ‘What the hell are you accusing me of? Why should that girl’s child resemble me rather than father?’

  ‘She told me, Philip. I gave her some clothes and a string of beads. She brought the baby for me to see – and then she told me. You said she should tell her mother the squire had raped her but it wasn’t like that, was it? You lay with her and you gave her presents – but when she told you she was carrying a child you didn’t want to be bothered so you told her to lie. Dick Blake didn’t murder our father, you did.’

  Philip looked green, but then he recovered and glared at her. He grabbed her by the wrist.

  ‘Breathe one word of this to Julia or Mother and I’ll kill you.’

  ‘You told me before. If I don’t say anything it is for Mama’s and Julia’s sake.’ Roz refused to flinch even though his fingers were digging into her flesh. ‘You’re rotten to the core, Philip.’

  ‘You made all this up to get back at me because I wouldn’t let you sue Paul Richmond.’ Philip’s top lip curved back in a sneer. ‘Who would believe her now? Or you, either? You went with Paul Richmond and then tried to say he’d raped you. I am certain he would back me up.’